amyblogschow: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1… Had bacon-wrapped meatloaf for the...

Mon, 02 Jan 2012 19:37:40 -0500

5, 4, 3, 2, 1…

Had bacon-wrapped meatloaf for the first time tonight. Preceding the meat feast: pickled jalapeño deviled eggs, goat cheese-stuffed mushrooms, mushroom risotto, pumpkin and spice infused vodka, wine, foosball…

Dessert to follow.

Why am I looking at food?

nicky36: STOP: lasagna time. just stop it. I want to be eating...

Mon, 02 Jan 2012 19:35:06 -0500

nicky36:

STOP: lasagna time.

just stop it. I want to be eating this right now!

Photo

Mon, 02 Jan 2012 19:11:10 -0500

cosmek: Norther Lights in Finnish Lapland (by Visit Finland)

Mon, 02 Jan 2012 18:47:50 -0500

cosmek:

Norther Lights in Finnish Lapland (by Visit Finland)

cosmek: Munnar, India (by davе)

Mon, 02 Jan 2012 18:45:30 -0500

cosmek:

Munnar, India (by davе)

1/2/12 - 6:44pm

Mon, 02 Jan 2012 18:44:00 -0500

Alright, so I’m not too much of a talker around people. Nor am I much of a poster on facebook. I just don’t see the need to profess my every thought to the world. Aside from that, I’m insecure in my thoughts, so why would I share them with anyone else, if I can hardly discuss them with myself? However, I think I’ll give tumblr a second chance. I won’t ask a single person to follow me, and I’ll just post my deepest thoughts and insecurities here. Regardless of whether they are logical or sane. But first off, I think you should learn who I am. Here’s what you need to know:

I am both an actor and singer, secure in neither, and certainly not a dancer.
I play the Mellophone. (working on French Horn)
My father is dead and has BEEN dead since April of 2009.
I am 17 as of right now, but will be 18 on September 18, 2012.
The number 23 is following me, and I enjoy its companionship.
I do at times enjoy looking at myself in the mirror. Mostly because I remind me of my father.
I hate arguing and I especially hate losing an argument. This might be why I try so hard to be right all the time.
I’m somewhat TOO sarcastic. And I know it, but it’s how I was raised. I can’t ignore an easy target and I come off as cocky, arrogant, and I sometimes upset people. I hate that about myself. I never intend to hurt anyone’s feelings, but I’m not sure how else to communicate sometimes.
I’m the typical “nice guy” in relationships. Now as nice as that may sound, nice guys get walked all over and trampled by the girls they attract. I need to learn to step out of that persona.
My family is not close knit at all. Aside from being essentially the only part of my family in this section of the country, I don’t exactly find myself to be close with my immediate family either. Because of that, I tend to be either a recluse and hide away in my room, or out with friends of my own choosing.
I often wonder what my family life will be like if and when I get married and have kids of my own. Will it mirror my current situation? Or will it be healthier because I know what not to do?
I once fooled a therapist into thinking I was well adjusted to the world that lay before me. I didn’t open up to him at all, and he had no clue. Or he didn’t care.
And last but not least, I sometimes write out entire entries like these, only to discover that I’m not too confident in them, and I delete them almost immediately. Lucky you, I didn’t do that this time.

1/2/12 - 5:43

Mon, 02 Jan 2012 17:44:57 -0500

Sonnet is really quite difficult to write. Not absolutely sure now just why I waited til the last minute to start it. It sucks to suck now, doesn’t it?